I have finally picked a side on a topic debated for generations by academics, scientists, clergymen, lovers, friends, water cooler and teenage conversations alike. I also say boldly that my side is the correct one. I have the answer. I know this now for certain like I know how to breathe. I claim no PhD, nor to know it all, just a regular woman figuring it out knowing she has a mission, like many of you reading. I’m certain my friends and those around me lately think I’ve gone off half cocked, as I stumbled around figuring it out. They’ll be okay though. The knowledge that I’ve found in knowing this answer means that I am, for certain, where I belong, and am only going to do more good things than I ever thought possible. At this moment my head aches so badly from all the directions and lights shed, and fear I’ll never have enough time to pursue it all, but that even I know I’ll get it organized too with and it will be okay. <Deep breaths>. <Breathe in, Breathe out>. Yes, its heavy.
So, before I ramble any further, here is that question everyone wants to know:
Do things happen in our lives coincidentally, or is there a reason for everything?
My life has been altered so dramatically in even the last few weeks- as I’m finally getting my true vision in focus. 45 years of searching for this, and it has finally come to an almost perfect clear vision. While, like my blog I have yet to categorize and tag it properly, I see now my purpose exact. As I went along with all these things happening, I was having almost flashback like moments to every memory my brain holds. Every person who’s came in and out of my life, every moment dared, dreamed, savored and wasted, every mistake and choice I made. None of it, not one bit, was a coincidence. I seed you today with the crazy notion that you as well are not living a life wasted, and that there are no coincidences in your life too.
My boss/pastor, that you met yesterday on my post about confronting love, and I, were having our usual life conversation this week and I was trying to put my experiences in words. As I was finding the right words, it was as though my life flashed before my eyes, and it all arose to clarity.
You may not know that my mom has been very sick for some time. We had a HUGE scare this week, as she was hospitalized again. We thought this was it, she was going to die, and the first thing I did was to phone our family Pastor (not my boss/pastor) to ask her to reach out to them, something I’d forgotten to do in the past scares. Our family Pastor is a newer member to the clergy, though not young and is finding her way too. As we spoke in that surreal life moment we all dread to have to face, she struggled for words of comfort for me. She stumbled, caught off guard, and then began to cite references from, thanks to my boss/pastor I realized I knew all too well, her training in the seminary about the 7 phases of death guide, or something like that. Its a tool for the clergy when aiding a family through a horrible time. Out my lips without any thought I stopped her mid sentence. I knew how hard it was for her as she’s not done this that often, thank goodness, and told her that she did not need to go on, or comfort me, that I was okay and her efforts were spent better having time to process and find the right words for my dad and sister. That’s a Pastor’s assistant thing to do, to keep them above water, and I realized I am one of those. But it was one of many moments that happened to me in the last weeks that contributed to what I was trying to explain to my pastor/boss during our talk.
As I stumbled to put it into words for him, that moment, and others, came to vision as I spoke. I then saw the connections floating around in my head yet to surface until, I suppose, I was ready to see it. Every single thing that has ever happened to me over my 45 years on this earth, every wish I’ve had, path I’ve gone on, dumb tv show I watched, every person bad and good in my life and past, every moment, every decision, every event– planned and unplanned, directly and indirectly was not a coincidence. There are none. There is always a reason.
I ask not of the reader to put a name on it. I’ve been clear I am not here to convert. I have my beliefs and wish not to argue them or force it on anyone. My mission does not discriminate based on beliefs. It could be God, the Universe or something we know not yet. My purpose is only to educate and help anyone through what my life has consisted of. But it starts, for me, and for those students, with the certainity that nothing was a coincidence in your life. My hope is that anyone who wants to start living their lives to the fullest, best most rewarding uplifting truth to learn, and a lot sooner than it took me if I can help it.
My favorite Author, Stephen King, stated in his book “On Writing,” something that floated around in my head stuck forever as I read it when it was first published and over and over again. I always felt in my heart I needed to be a writer, and the line that’s been stuck in here was to “write what you know.”
So I did. Ever so slowly, I’m blessed to truly understand it now, what that advice means to me. As I’ve stumbled around in doing this blog, by heeding that advice, soul searching, seeking. receiving and treasuring valuable feedback graced to me of not coincidental means propelled the understanding like a rocket. I found the answer to that question and I know what to do now. Its quite a relief, I must add. Infact, Its so comforting you cannot even imagine.
I say to you.. you can make a difference, you can change the world. You can plant seeds, and they will grow. You can speak the truth and know your words are not falling on deaf ears, even if you can’t hear it.
Because there are no coincidences, everything happens for a reason, and you have a purpose too.
Happy Friday. I hope I finally got this out right, and it makes sense. If you are wondering, my mom is doing better, 3 dialysis’s later. I’m leaving to get the grand baby soon and try hard not to think too much more, just play with her and absorb this miracle in my life. The baby and the answer.
I invite all thoughts and debates in the comments. It only grows us closer and stronger in our quests.
Love, uplift and encouragement to all.