I wrote a post “Does Time Really Heal All Wounds,” for a man named Christopher Glosser, the same man who abandoned me last weekend after the marathon in favor of his selfish needs. I came across this one today and was shocked at how similar it was to how I feel today. There’s a lesson there and here too, that I’ve learned now finally. I’ll tell you what it was at the end of this slightly altered re-post.
I used to believe that. It used to be true.
If I could take one thing back, I’d never of accepted a friend request I got in early January, 2013.
It was the start of a complete waste of a year and a half of my life.
I’m sure he is reading these, (yes, he’s that big of a coward folks), I’d like to tell you this, NGRF I believed in us, I believed in you. How you could question me or wonder why I could love you and want to be with you, after all we shared, digital and together – and when we weren’t together but still connected–is completely SICK. After you knew the kind of person I REALLY am… it’s just incredible how horrible you were. How you could treat me as anything but the girl you were meant to be with is so wacked I don’t even know what to say.
But you are, beyond screwed up, aren’t you? You “blocked” it all out, you forgot? Well, you really didn’t— its EATING AWAY AT YOU, how STUPID you were and how miserable you are STILL. But you like miserable. I’ll NEVER KNOW why you were attracted to me, because who you are is completely nothing like me, I know now.
GROW UP COWARD!! No, better yet, stay where you’re at and continue looking like the complete fool you really are. Yes, I see that now!!
You’ll never have the guts to face me, DO RIGHT BY ME, to be the man you “pretended” you were. You will stay hidden in your cowardly little shell, so stay there. I’m sure one day that house will show you the love you so desperately think your going to somehow get by being a pathetic martyr.
You’ll NEVER get anything from what I say, because you couldn’t listen when you actually had me around. You hurt my heart and soul more than anyone and you preyed on a very vulnerable woman in a horrible time in my life. I hope you are proud of yourself.
I GOT NOTHING GOOD FROM KNOWING YOU, and you are a very, very selfish pathetic human being.
I’d like to say I feel better, but I don’t. Things shouldn’t have gone this way… it’s so sad how stupid people can be. But I want to get past this.. I NEED TO.
So the lesson I guess I learned is I should have gone with my gut back when I posted this months ago and did not. I kept hoping, dreaming and believing and found out a very hard way a leopard doesn’t change his spots.
You might have one too and if so, just move on and try to forget the pain but remember it isn’t you, but they who are the problem. Also that good things and people will come your way if you can persevere.